I can’t resist playing the "favourite movie" game that keeps doing the rounds on social media:
Favourite Movie: “Wild in the Country.”
Movie That Makes You Think of Your Childhood: “Blue Hawaii.” One of the first two Elvis movies I ever saw. Living in the cold, wet, and grey of northern England, I thought it was Paradise.
Favourite Tom Hanks Movie: the forthcoming Elvis film in which Hanks plays Elvis’ miscreant mis/manager, the tasteless parasite that was Tom Parker May he be listening to 'Old MacDonald Had a Farm' on a tape loop in the eternal prison of Hell.
Favourite Tom Cruise Movie: I don’t know Tom Cruise too much but he seems similar to Kurt Russell, who was in “It Happened at the World’s Fair.” It’s a wretched film, but it would have been Tom Cruise’s best film had he been in it.
Movie That Makes You Cry: Elvis films always made me cry when I realized they were coming to an end. I would spend days looking forward to seeing them. And then, as soon as we reached the hour mark, I would be counting the minutes down sadly to the end. “Change of Habit” is moving, with poor Elvis lusting after a nun and playing happy families with that withdrawn little person. In an entirely different way, "Yoga is as Yoga Does" in "Easy Come Easy Go" also makes me cry. And laugh. "Paradise Hawaiian Style" just makes me cry in pain and anguish.
Favourite Western: “Flaming Star.” Directed by Don Siegel, this is Elvis as Clint Eastwood and Marlon Brando rolled into one.
Favourite War Movie: “G.I. Blues.” There’s no war going on but Elvis is in uniform throughout, and there is a big punch-up in the local bierkeller to the sound of ‘Blue Suede Shoes.’ Someone insulted Elvis! That’s cause for war enough.
Favourite 80s Movie: “This is Elvis”
Favourite Comedy: “Follow that Dream.”
Favourite Romantic Comedy: “Viva Las Vegas” (I would also say “Live a Little, Love a Little” if I had the first idea of what is going on. I’m not sure if it is romantic or if Elvis has been kidnapped by a mad woman. Which is a kind of romance, I suppose).
Favourite Sports Movie: “Kid Galahad,” the greatest boxing musical ever. Elvis could do it all, he was amazing.
Favourite Courtroom Movie: Elvis always seemed to be on trial. ‘Loving You,’ ‘Blue Hawaii,’ ‘Jailhouse Rock.’ ‘Follow that Dream’ has a fantastic court scene at the end.
Favourite Horror Movie: “Tickle Me,” it’s got a haunted hotel full of ghosts and goblins, which turn out to be masked men in search of Pam’s hidden treasure. If you love 'Scooby Do' you'll love this film.
Most Overrated Movie: Anything without Elvis is overrated. Since everything can be improved with the addition of Elvis, then every film without Elvis is less good than it could have been, and hence overrated with any kind of rating. I was trained in logic. Not that I ever use it.
Favourite Gangster Movie: “King Creole.” Elvis fighting to escape the control of local gangster Maxie Fields, trying to keep out of his clutches by running off with his wife. Which didn’t go down well. "The Trouble with Girls (And How to Get into It)" has a little gangster theme going on, too. Outfits.
Favourite Sci-Fi Movie: “Kissin Cousins.” I’m not exactly sure where that second Elvis came from. Some say it is the real Elvis in a wig. I say it must be aliens.
Movie You Can Watch Over and Over: Elvis films generally. But “Live a Little, Love a Little” is one that I’d like to see again, to try for the umpteenth time to work out what the heck is going on.
Movie With the Best Soundtrack: “King Creole,' "Loving You,” or "Jailhouse Rock."
Movie You’re Most Embarrassed That You Love: “Harum Scarum,” a film that has to be seen and still not believed. I’m not that embarrassed by it, mind. It is so bizarrely bad as to be compelling. I think I would be loathe to admit to having seen ‘Kissin’ Cousins’ more than once.
Favourite Christmas Movie: The ten Elvis films that the BBC showed Christmas 1977. I thought "Kissin' Cousins" the worst film ever, until I saw "Stay Away Joe" two days later. I’m still not embarrassed by them though. At a certain stage, one loses the sense of embarrassment. I think that may be how corruption progresses to finally consume the soul.
Favourite Sequel: “Girls! Girls! Girls!” and “Paradise Hawaiian Style” were kind of sequels, “Blue Hawaii II” and “Blue Hawaii III”
Favourite Foreign Film: “Fun in Acapulco.” Elvis goes to Mexico and sings “You Can’t Say No in Acapulco.” So I won't. OK, he shot it all in a Hollywood backlot. But it seems Mexican. Even “Bossa Nova Baby.” Frankly, the Elvis world in general is incredibly foreign as in exotic-bizarre-otherworldly. I mean, it can’t be real, surely.
Worst Movie: “Paradise Hawaiian Style” is pretty grim. It has a depressingly uninteresting script, it looks cheaply shot, the songs are atrocious, the jokes unfunny, and Elvis looks overweight and sounds plain bored. The one gag of the story is that Elvis is carrying on with half the female population. To be honest, he doesn’t look as though he has the energy to carry on breathing. He doesn't look remotely interested, and neither do the women. The least said the better about that precocious brat mugging for attention in every scene. They should have hired a talking camel. This film is an environmental hazard. There are other contenders, though. I never cared for “Spinout,” “Easy Come Easy Go,” “Clambake,” “Double Trouble,” and “Speedway.” They are laboured and lazy. This was the Swinging Sixties and Elvis just seems prematurely middle-aged and boring.
And to think there are people who think I know nothing about films! I'm an expert!